Film maker Anita Rani went in search of reasons for the Japanese preference for celibacy Her friend Yamiko adds: It became awkward when the question of the future came up. And that's from a woman who knows a bit about whipping. Japan's unders appear to be losing interest in conventional relationships. Nor is growing preoccupation with digital technology. Although Japan is sexually permissive, the current fantasy ideal for women under 25 is impossibly cute and virginal. Another study found that a third of people under 30 had never dated at all. But, smart phones in hand, they also admit they spend far more time communicating with their friends via online social networks than seeing them in the flesh.
Satoru Kishino, 31, belongs to a large tribe of men under 40 who are engaging in a kind of passive rebellion against traditional Japanese masculinity. The lead character in Otomen "Girly Men" was a tall martial arts champion, the king of tough-guy cool. The World Economic Forum consistently ranks Japan as one of the world's worst nations for gender equality at work. Japanese women have become more independent and ambitious. I go out with my girl friends — career women like me — to French and Italian restaurants. But demographer Nicholas Eberstadt argues that a distinctive set of factors is accelerating these trends in Japan. Aversion to marriage and intimacy in modern life is not unique to Japan. It's the word I hear both sexes use most often when they talk about their relationship phobia. It's not an option for women like me. Japanese-American author Roland Kelts , who writes about Japan's youth, says it's inevitable that the future of Japanese relationships will be largely technology driven. You end up being a housewife with no independent income. Amid the recession and unsteady wages, men like Kishino feel that the pressure on them to be breadwinning economic warriors for a wife and family is unrealistic. Japan already has one of the world's lowest birth rates. Tomita has a job she loves in the human resources department of a French-owned bank. For their government, "celibacy syndrome" is part of a looming national catastrophe. Japan's somethings are the age group to watch. Aoyama, 52, is trying to cure what Japan's media calls sekkusu shinai shokogun, or "celibacy syndrome". They are rejecting the pursuit of both career and romantic success. I asked the association's head, Kunio Kitamura, why. Secretly, he loved baking cakes, collecting "pink sparkly things" and knitting clothes for his stuffed animals. And the centuries-old belief that the purpose of marriage is to produce children endures. And that's from a woman who knows a bit about whipping. Most are still too young to have concrete future plans, but projections for them are already laid out. Emi Kuwahata, 23, and her friend, Eri Asada, 22, meet me in the shopping district of Shibuya. Its population of million , which has been shrinking for the past decade, is projected to plunge a further one-third by
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